sizzle sizzle
sizzle sizzle


Look at me. Bow chicka wow. My life is super ultra sexy, especially the part made of BIG FAT DIRTY LIES.

My life actually looks more like this.

Hang onto your ovaries!
Hang onto your ovaries!

I am a dishevelled, translucent, neurotic dirt woman. But at least my children are not at all messed up?

I’m VICKI MURPHY — a mom slash writer (blogger, author, ad woman, columnist, grocery lister, etc.) in St. John’s, Newfoundland and Labrador. And this website is where I candidly share my misadventures in motherhood. You won’t find any craft ideas or cupcake recipes here, sweetie. Just lots of talk about kids and vaginas and how the former comes out of the latter and how fucked up yet beautiful yet fucked up that is.

If you haven’t checked out already, nice to meet you! And if you’re looking for Mother Blogger, you’ve come to the right place. The site is called MotherFumbler now, to match the title of my book. Marketing and all that. Unfortunately I’m kind of a mess so if you so see “mother blogger” written somewhere, THAT’S ME TOO WEEEEEEEEE!

 

47 Comments on INSIDE ME

  1. Paige Ricketts
    July 15, 2011 at 5:19 pm (6 years ago)

    I’m not sure if you would remember me or not but I am Kristan Winters cousin from PEI. I seen Claralee Rideout had a post for your blog on her facebook page and I started reading it…it’s hallarious!!!! I was just reading your last post about raising a Newfie and I seen your pics and one said Nanny Combden and I wondered if it was you and sure enough it was!!!! I look forward to hearing more of your adventures in Newfoundland. I will be attending Memorial in September. My sister and her husband both went to Memorial so I understand the part of your blog saying how to appreciate Newfoundland because visiting it every few years makes you really appreciate it’s beauty…among other things!!!! Can’t wait to hear more on Mother Blogger!!!!!!

    Reply
  2. Mother Blogger
    July 19, 2011 at 12:11 am (6 years ago)

    I do remember you! Thank you so much for the sweet note. Not entirely surprising from a young lady named Page. Ha ha, I know – it’s Paige. But it still works.

    Best of luck at MUN in September!

    Reply
  3. Vicki B.
    August 13, 2011 at 2:12 am (6 years ago)

    Love your blog Vicki C! Still remember our M5 days. At least you stuck it out. Keep mother-bloggin’ writing.

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      August 13, 2011 at 12:23 pm (6 years ago)

      Thanks, Vicki B. My email address serves as a reminder of you: vicki@m5.ca was already taken. 🙂 So you’ll always be #1…

      Reply
  4. Georgina
    September 21, 2011 at 1:06 am (6 years ago)

    “I write solely to entertain you as I chronicle my adventures through motherhood.”

    I would say…you have succeeded…your writing is beyond entertaining!!! I hope you never “figure it all out”. I continue to be amazed by your ability to express yourself and at the same time connect with others. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      September 25, 2011 at 11:30 pm (6 years ago)

      Thanks for being so mother bloggin’ supportive, Georgina!

      Reply
  5. Gina
    September 21, 2011 at 7:02 pm (6 years ago)

    Wow

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      September 25, 2011 at 11:31 pm (6 years ago)

      Is this you or was one of your furkids packin’ around on the computer again? Clue: wow is often preceded by bow.

      Reply
      • Gina
        October 17, 2011 at 6:06 pm (6 years ago)

        Heeheehee! It was me all by myself without aid from fur babies!

        Reply
  6. wendy @ mama one to three
    October 12, 2011 at 1:28 am (6 years ago)

    I found your blog through the Parents Best Blogs site. This is truly great stuff– love your writing style; I completely admire you now. 🙂

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      October 12, 2011 at 4:34 pm (6 years ago)

      Thank you so much! Hope I can keep you amused…

      Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      October 13, 2011 at 12:33 am (6 years ago)

      And hey, are you a blogger too?

      Reply
  7. Diana Colbert
    October 23, 2011 at 11:22 am (6 years ago)

    My RMT, the wonderful, fabulous Brenda Madden told me about your blog. As I sit here this morning reading the latest post, I have spit out mouthfuls of tea at the laptop screen (how exactly does one get that clean?). I appreciate your thoughts as I too, have a “ginger”. He will be 4 in November and is the light of my life and is passionate and fiercely independant (a nice way of saying he can be a little frigger!) Anyways, I have thoroughly enjoyed my read this morning and will continue to follow your blog weekly. One more thing, we will make it out of this adventure, when they turn 20. Just HOW many years do we have left? 🙂

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      October 23, 2011 at 11:33 am (6 years ago)

      When we make it out, our hair will be good and white. And they’ll still be ginger. Thanks for the sweet note, Diana! Glad to have you following along…

      Reply
  8. Jaime
    October 23, 2011 at 12:35 pm (6 years ago)

    Great Blog! I’ve never been a “blog” person, but you are hilarious! I am a new mom, he is 5 months old and an angel, but then again, he can’t talk back. lol! I found you through my cousin, Dawn and I noticed that I went to school with your husband. Small world. I truly enjoy your comedy. Not often does something make me laugh out loud. Keep it up! You’re awesome!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      October 24, 2011 at 12:17 am (6 years ago)

      Small world indeed! Thanks for reading, and hope to keep you amused in the future. Have fun with your “angel”. Check back in 6-12 months and tell me if his halo has gone the way of the dodo.

      Reply
  9. Paul Murrin
    November 15, 2011 at 5:05 pm (6 years ago)

    Loving the posts Vic. Keep up the great posts

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      November 16, 2011 at 1:26 am (6 years ago)

      Thanks, Pauly!

      Reply
  10. Stephanie Holmes-Winton
    January 4, 2012 at 5:34 pm (6 years ago)

    I was just reading your to breed or not to breed article. Wonderful and hilarious sums it up!! I admire a woman brave enough to wonder about this particular quandary out loud!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      January 6, 2012 at 5:54 pm (6 years ago)

      Thank you, come back anytime!

      Reply
  11. Jody Burke
    January 5, 2012 at 3:38 pm (6 years ago)

    Just read your to breed or not to breed article – absolutely hilarious. I had to stop reading twice I was laughing so hard. Great stuff!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      January 6, 2012 at 5:53 pm (6 years ago)

      THANK YOU!!!

      Reply
  12. That Crafty Bitch
    February 22, 2012 at 4:58 am (6 years ago)

    Hey, love the blog! Super witty and full of kick-in-teeth honesty. Also, I was surprised when I was on a website recently and saw Max’s photo from your “To Breed or Not to Breed” post in a banner for Goodwrench. Not sure if you knew this, I figured I’d throw you a heads up, in case.

    Keep rockin’, Mother Blogger.

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      February 25, 2012 at 1:17 am (6 years ago)

      Yes, I was aware. Ain’t he cute?

      Reply
  13. Rukaya
    April 3, 2012 at 2:56 pm (5 years ago)

    I totally love your blogs! iv got everyone around me hooked to your page! freaking awesome i tell ya! people will soon think I am mentally unstable for my loud outbursts of laughter… but even if I should be institutionalised, I will still be one of your biggest fans! HIGH 5!!! U A ROCKSTAR OF A MOM! keep blogging!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      April 6, 2012 at 1:24 am (5 years ago)

      No YOU are a rock star. No you! No you!

      Reply
  14. Brigitte
    May 7, 2012 at 7:43 am (5 years ago)

    Hi motherbloggers, I like your view on things. Let me share with you mine. I am a mess, I forget about dinners but never to sing a lullaby from the top of my lungs. I am French, lived in London, HK, moved to NYC with 3 kids, and there struggle so much that I felt pregnant with twins! Yep, 3 + 2 make 5!. Apparently there were triplets to start with, but typical of me, I didn’t realize I was 3 months pregnant, and went skiing.
    Anyway, I tried to find a babysitter or a nanny in New York, but there was no way. So I moved to Singapore and created a free app iBabySit to help parents find directly babysitters. If my app is a success, maybe I will be bale to move back to New York!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      May 15, 2012 at 1:29 am (5 years ago)

      Wow – mess or not, what an interesting life you lead!

      Reply
  15. Shannon Vander Meulen
    May 14, 2012 at 3:04 am (5 years ago)

    Hello motherblogger

    I stumbled across your blog for the first time tonight and I love your humour. I have four kids and the last thing I need is a website about purees or crafts. What I need is a good laugh to go along with my glass of wine after I finally get the kiddos to bed. So thanks for that!

    Shannon Vander Meulen

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      May 15, 2012 at 1:24 am (5 years ago)

      Pass the wine, Shannon! xo

      Reply
  16. Heather
    August 25, 2012 at 12:59 am (5 years ago)

    Hey! Love the blog! Please don’t ever stop! I got your info about your blog from an old friend of yours Mr. Chris Bragg! I could kiss him for introducing me! I’m a mom of two (18 month and 6 month). The humor and honesty is compelling and you say what many are thinking but won’t!
    I love you and I don’t even know you! Looking forward to many more side splitting posts.
    All my best.

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      August 29, 2012 at 3:43 pm (5 years ago)

      If you’re a friend of Mr. Bragg, then you’re a friend of mine.

      Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      October 16, 2012 at 12:43 am (5 years ago)

      Ima check yo shit out, yo. xo

      Reply
  17. Michelle
    October 5, 2012 at 4:03 pm (5 years ago)

    I have to tell you that I actually have to make a conscious effort NOT to read your blog while at work because it’s inevitable that I end up laughing until I cry. But it’s like blog crack and once I start, I. Cannot. Stop. You really do crack me up.

    And for the record, I love the names you give your Turbo Ginger and I love the potty mouth.

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      October 16, 2012 at 12:42 am (5 years ago)

      Blog crack. I am going to use that. xo

      Reply
  18. Vanessa
    November 8, 2012 at 12:34 am (5 years ago)

    Just discovered this from a “like” a friend clicked on facebook. Read your last six facebook posts and laughed so hard I cried a little… clicked on the blog and read the post about forgetting your Dad’s birthday and cried a lot.

    I’m a mom of one 18 month old and I cannot put into words the beauty that is finding someone who also laughs when they swear, doesn’t take everything seriously and isn’t going to tell me that I suck at parenting for not creating all her food from scratch (to say nothing of my appreciation for the “homie” and “dude” post) – and to discover it in someone who writes about it brilliantly.

    I cannot wait to read every single thing you’ve posted here…. which I fully intend to do while the kid watches too much television 😉

    Thank you.

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      November 8, 2012 at 3:04 am (5 years ago)

      You just made my fucken day. xoxo

      Reply
  19. Erin
    June 26, 2013 at 6:21 am (4 years ago)

    I wanted to read some of the mom blogs and yours was the first one that came up. You are so hilarious that I was laughing till the tears came into my eyes. Your blog is just what I wanted to read. You are really great at reliving all those memories for all of us. Thanks for making me laugh!!!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      June 27, 2013 at 3:12 am (4 years ago)

      Thank you for the note, Erin. Feel free to like Mother Blogger on facebook so you can get updates on new posts. I don’t blog that often (I need to actually BE a mother in order to get material apparently – lol), but I like to entertain via FB and Twitter (@motherbloggery) fairly often, if you’re interested.

      Reply
  20. sassypiehole
    November 8, 2013 at 2:02 am (4 years ago)

    Love your blog… You are one funny bitch. If you’re ever in Atlanta, lets get hammered and swap stories!

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      November 8, 2013 at 9:38 pm (4 years ago)

      Yes please, bitch.

      Reply
  21. Holefiller
    April 21, 2014 at 12:44 pm (3 years ago)

    I got yer book. A put it down ma pants n asked my gf to sniff it after. She said it smells like sex, balls & nachos.

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      July 22, 2014 at 12:50 am (3 years ago)

      That is exactly what I was going for.

      Reply
  22. Clare
    June 12, 2014 at 4:59 pm (3 years ago)

    A friend lent me your book and I loved it so much I purchased it just to line your hilarious pocket with another shiny dime.

    I routinely wake my sleeping hubby up after he has drifted off to sleep to read him excerpts from your blog. He really loves it when I do that……….

    You make me need to pee.

    C

    Reply
    • Mother Blogger
      June 17, 2014 at 6:10 pm (3 years ago)

      This is one of the best notes I have yet to receive. A compliment AND another shiny toonie (it’s a toonie per book, not a dime). Yeehaw. I make myself want to pee. I am peeing right now.

      Reply

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